Sunday, October 14, 2007

“Live like a King – Dine like a Pauper”

I read on CNN's web site that “Foreclosure filings across the U.S. nearly doubled last month compared with September 2006, as financially strapped homeowners already behind on mortgage payments defaulted on their loans or came closer to losing their homes to foreclosure”.

Back in 1980, anxious to move upward and provide my bride with a new home, I began the process of buying a house in a brand new subdivision here in Baytown. I sought the advice of my Pastor, the late L. S. Marcus. I laid out what I planned to do and how much it would cost me and he listened patiently. Being a Veteran, I could move in for only a buck. I really wanted the house and I had all but made the decision when I paid him a visit.

Much to my disappointment, he advised against the purchase and told me something I’ve never forgotten and it has been the basis for many a financial decision since. “If you buy this house, you will live like a king, but dine like a pauper”. I sat and stared, pleading with my eyes, but in my heart, I knew this house was not in my future. He was right and we both knew it.

I casually argued that both my wife and I had good jobs and we could make the note. He countered that if something happened to my job, or my wife’s, it would make things very difficult in our household and went on to tell me about how financial strain wrecks more marriages than infidelity.

I told him I was soon to get a raise on my job. He laughed and countered with a truth I hadn’t factored in. We wanted to start a family. Our bills were soon to escalate. He told me we could make the choice now of living a bit lower on the social ladder which would free us to pursue a richer life.

My wife and I wanted what was already becoming a rarity – a traditional American family, where dad brought home the bacon and mom was always there for the kiddos. He knew it and we knew it. A big new home with a big new house note and at this time, the banks had introduced escalating payments, something that turned out to be very bad for the average homeowner.

I left his office in a somber mood. My dream of a big new home was a poor choice and I guess I knew it before I sought counseling. I am forever in debt to Pastor Marcus for telling me what I needed, instead of telling me what I wanted to hear.

My bride and I went on to buy an old wood-frame house on piers in Wooster, instead of that nice new brick house in the shiny new subdivision. We lived and dined well, even when Reaganomics caused a lay-off and a slowdown in chemical plant work. We raised 2 children in that house, made many thousands of dollars in improvements as the money steadily came in through my labors and my bride and I enjoyed the traditional American family we so wanted.

We lived on Ashby Street for 12 years and when the time was right, we moved to another established neighborhood, instead of buying into a brand spanking new one, with a brand new wallet-slapping mortgage. Once again, we made the choice to live a bit below, so we could live a bit above.

It’s the old story of the tortoise and the hare and we are the tortoise. I’ve watched as people spend with abandon, owning just about anything they could possibly purchase and at times, I’ve wondered what the quality of my life would be if I had succumbed to that philosophy. Four-wheel drive ATV’s with $3000 worth of extras, $45,000 cars and trucks, $150,000-200,000 homes, $10,000 whitetail deer leases in South Texas and well, the list is endless.

I wish I had known Granny Adcox of Highlands back then to get her advice, but I bet she would have told me the same thing as Pastor Marcus.

I told a young friend of mine that life is not about how much stuff you can accumulate. He replied “I thought that was the meaning of life, I mean, what else is there”? I’ve learned over time that less is more and that the abundance of worldly goods has little to do with happiness and comfort and it all goes back to that day in the office of Pastor Marcus.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

I really enjoyed this one, Bert! I was also fortunate enough to have sound advice in my younger days as my husband and I started a family. I've lived my dream of being a stay-at-home mom for MANY years. There's no material item I'd trade for the time my life allows me to spend with my children and husband.

Banjo Jones said...

If only more Americans looked at life this way, a whole lotta folks coulda saved themselves a lot of grief and worry ... excellent post, Bert.

Anonymous said...

I found your blog by accident, just following links, from one myspace to another. But I'm going to bookmark it and visit occasionally, just to see what you have to say. I am nowhere near Texas, but if I was I would offer to buy you (and your wife) a cup of coffee. You sound people I would like to meet. Good luck to you!

Anonymous said...

Congrats on getting your son home safely. Tell him thanks for the great service he has provided.

Eric Surname

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