Wednesday, November 08, 2006

Let's join the crowd!

Years ago, back in my formative years, I wanted a pair of hopsack pants. I wanted them real bad. They were becoming very popular and I whined that “all the kids were wearing them”, which as any parent knows, is fodder for objection, resistance and parental instruction. My Dad was (and still is) an expert at bringing fuzzy thoughts into focus. He was fond of explaining to me at times like this that “if everyone was eating mud sandwiches, would you want to eat one too?”

His actual version is a tad graphic for my more sensitive readers, but the point is, he had a way with words that always left me thinking and of course, I didn’t let on at the time, but I was ‘getting it”, albeit slowly.

I went on to get a pair of burnt brown hopsack pants anyway and I was so proud of them. I just knew my Dad didn’t have it right this time.

One memorable day, my really hip and cool-looking britches openly betrayed me and although I was horrified at the time, it is quite funny now. Hopsack is this rough material that is woven and can be made from a variety of materials. This pair decided, evidentially on its own, to separate in the seam between the back pockets and gave my fellow students a generous view of my Fruit of the Loom’s.

I remember thinking it felt rather breezy that day as I sauntered down the hallway heading for another class. I was cool and hip as usual when I was in my burnt brown hopsack britches and paisley shirt and I just knew I was viewed as such, when someone tapped me on the shoulder and said those most grievous words “Your pants are split out in the back, Bub”…

Reaching around at a speed that was something akin to Mach one, to my absolute horror, I found the great divide. Yikes and double yikes! With my face a crimson red, I headed directly to the boys bathroom.

Across the hall from the restroom was Home Economics class and my 911 plan was to have someone take my britches over there and have them sewn up, while I waited in the privacy of the bathroom. It was a good plan and the first student who came in that I trusted, was handed the offending pants and off he went, me peeking out the door in my “under draws”.

“Oh, why didn’t I wear my Levi’s to school?” I groaned, as only a youth can, when they think they are experiencing a real emergency. The bathroom door opened time and time again as high school boys came in and each one looked at me like I was a freak pervert until I hurriedly explained my situation. It was traumatic. It was awful. I was embarrassed beyond words and what made it even worse, was the girls across the hallway were laughing and carrying on and I just knew it was me and my britches that provided the entertainment.

Well, I finally got my pants back after a half hour of agonizing and donning them, scurried off like a defeated warrior-child. The hopsack pants weren’t “all that” after that experience and looking back to this one incident many times in my life, I always use them to judge whether I will go along with the crowd, or go my separate way. It sounds trivial, but true; it became for me, a life lesson. Dad was right again!

Over the years, my military buddies all went and got tattooed. I didn’t and tattooing back then, was only for Sailors, motorcycle riders, rebels and pirates and a sign that you were a bonafide hard case, but I still wouldn’t get one. I went my own way. Today’s youth all seemingly want to be tattooed and pierced and when my two teens professed an interest, I told them a version of what my Dad told me back when I was a teen. I also posed them this question:

“If everyone is doing something to stand out and be different and you don’t follow suit, who is actually the trend-setting person?” Adam Sandler is a perfect example of what I am writing about. He has no adornments at all and his peers practically invented the adornment industry. He proves my point. Less is more.

My Dad taught my sister, brothers and I to be our own person, even if it goes against the crowd and that’s the greatest gift he could have given us. The crowd is not always correct, even though they appear to be in the majority. If everyone wears lots of jewelry and you don’t or if all have tattoos and you chose not to, who is exercising the greater choice? Of course, some would rather “just fit in” and that is fine also; just not for me.

The bottom line in my life has been to shun group decisions that I feel are only fads and go my own way, especially if it is a long term decision, as in a tattoo or financing the latest cool car. If all are adorned with “extras”, then the one with the least amount of “extras” is ultimately, the best adorned and the least likely to follow the crowd.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

The truth seems to just flow from your finger tips. I love reading what you write. Great blog Bert!!!

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