The bigger the lie

Politics.  Nothing has changed in all the hundreds of years that law makers have stood before the masses and projected themselves as “champions” of truth.  Americans went through about a 20 year period of head in the sand ignorance, but we are returning to the days of the Lincoln – Douglas debates; thank God.  This go around the main issue isn’t slavery, or immigration, or race relations.

 

It’s getting the United States of America back into the hands of the people voting and just like in the 1860’s Americans are wising up.  We are listening, but folks, let’s actually listen this go around.

Politicians in general are currently viewed as self-serving professional wallet-skinners and I am right there with this assessment.  As my Nigerian-born friend George Eligiri once told me about Nigerian politicians, “once they go back to make radical changes in the system, they are instantly corrupted and join the problem.”

I think the cancerous environment of law-making is so overwhelming; no one survives their initial intentions of making changes.  No politician, regardless of what their political flavor, can get anything accomplished without massive trade-offs or outright finagling.

Yes.  I said finagling and we’ve seen this so abundantly that it is almost expected.  Mrs. Clinton is a prime example.  Her trail is so littered with dubious and dishonest (either by commission or omission) finagling that she dismisses with an almost flippant sarcasm; belligerently daring anyone to question her.  The bigger the lie the more people will accept it.  On top of that, her erased email server screams guilt.  Her reaction is pure contempt that her integrity is even questioned.

“The essential English leadership secret does not depend on particular intelligence. Rather, it depends on a remarkably stupid thick-headedness. The English follow the principle that when one lies, it should be a big lie, and one should stick to it. They keep up their lies, even at the risk of looking ridiculous.”

In my April first column, titled: “The dog catchers bacon”, I talked about a fictitious character who drove around in the shadows, basically identified only by his broad and friendly smile and the crispy bacon.  In the story, every hair on my head stood up in warning, but I was drawn in by his smile and the wonderful fragrance of his gifts.  These two wonders caused me to drop my guard, even though everything about the man was blatantly wrong.

In the parody, I somehow came to my senses before I gave up my two prized possessions (read my rights and property or if this doesn’t make sense, my two dogs).  The sneaky thief who almost beguiled me with false promises skedaddled in a cloud of smoke and I was so confused, I couldn’t even file a police report.  Thus I was manipulated for the whole process to repeat itself, most likely in another guise.  That is exactly how our political pundits survive to stay in a position of power.

The bigger their lie – Remember Richard Nixon’s “I am not a crook”, or Hillary’s husband, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman”?  J Edgar Hoover stayed in power for years by spying on everyone.  No one said a word when he was recognized at parties dressed as a woman – a very ugly woman too.  This was conservative America and folks we tight-lipped as a clam.  The bigger the lie the more people will accept it.

Has our President fulfilled any of the promises and hope that won him the vaunted Nobel Peace Prize?  He won it on hope and a promise.  In doing so, he devalued the prize exponentially, just like his crony Al Gore did.  The bigger the inconvenient truth the more people will accept it.

Giving these guys a Nobel Peace Prize pretty much means Ernest P. Worrell should be awarded one for bringing hope to children who feel they cannot excel.

My dogcatcher story was so preposterous, it became credible to some.  3 TV stations called me, the Baytown Sun, and even the Baytown Police Department’s Lt. Eric Freed for a follow up.  I was standing in Sedona, Arizona when my phone rang April 1^st after the story ran.  “Is this Bert Marshall?  This is ____ at Fox News in Pennsylvania, we want to do a follow-up on the dog catcher story…”

I grinned and said, “Are you a journalist?”  She said she was and I told her it was a political satire piece for April Fools Day.  I heard her yell to someone, “Oh!  It’s an April Fools prank!”  She then hung up.  My first thought was, “Geeze, don’t journalist’s comprehend what they read any more?”

Nope, the bigger the lie the more people will accept it, so get ready to hear about a year’s worth of verbal dodgeball while we try to elect a pre-selected politician who actually cares about the people.  Oh, the quote in paragraph 6 is by the propaganda minister of the Third Reich, Joseph Goebbels and was paraphrasing from Adolf Hitler’s “Mein Kampf”.

Blood, Some Sweat, and Possibly… Fears?

I stood about a mile down the Bright Angel Trail inside the Grand Canyon in sunny Arizona and heard a 10 year old teary-eyed girl complain “We could have gone to Disneyland”.   Before her parents could reply, I said, “I felt the same way when I was your age, but now I realize my parents gave me experiences I could never duplicate in an amusement park.”

Her mom and dad just shook their heads knowingly and my beautiful bride and I turned and began the descent to the 1.5 mile house below.  My wife didn’t correct me for speaking out and I thank her for that, but what I said was the truth.  No man-made faux entertainment facade can duplicate God’s creations.   I know, as my Dad made sure I saw raw nature growing up as we meandered coast to coast.

The Bright Angel Trail begins at the rim the Grand Canyon and to put this place into perspective, let me relive my first glimpse into the giant crack. 

We drove my Jeep from Baytown to Clovis, New Mexico the first day – 700 miles.  That is a long way in a lifted Jeep running 4.88 gears and 35 inch tires.  Day two found us in incredible Sedona, New Mexico.  I say incredible because it is a Mecca of trails, hiking, and ATV off-roading and this appeals to the freedom-loving side of our psyche.

We wanted to hike to Cathedral Rock and not knowing the ins and outs, we were disappointed when the parking area was full.  We were redirected 2 miles away to the auxiliary parking lot.  To put it in plain English, I was PO’d, as in “not particularly happy”.  Well, it turned out that this redirect was a blessing in disguise, as the 4.5 hour round trip hike on the trail was exactly what we physically wanted.  It also prepped us for the big crack hike.

The other way was a round trip of about an hour and the easy way in and out and not at all what we wanted.  Sometimes our path is not our own, but exactly what we need.  Think about that a moment.  If I was a Bible preacher, that would preach.  It would preach good.  Adversity is actually our friend.

We wanted to do more there and we did, seeing ancient cliff dwellings and because of my Dad and Mom, I have an appreciation of such historical sites.  Wrapping up, we drove north for the Grand Canyon and the historic El Tovar hotel – the one where Teddy Roosevelt stayed – and Sir Paul McCartney.  Some of its attraction is lost on me though – like no elevator and almost non-existent Internet service.  Old Teddy probably didn’t notice.

Well, seeing we had already hiked through some clothes, we had to make a laundry run and this took a couple of hours after check in.  Neither my bride nor I wanted to hit the sack before seeing the actual Grand Canyon, so we stepped off the 100 yards or so to the rim behind the hotel to get our first look at the big crack.

Holy Evil Knievel!  Talk about something bigger than what you can imagine!

I immediately stepped back and took a deep breath.  I had a feeling of acrophobia, mixed with a healthy dose of vertigo after looking over the measly 4 foot stone wall.  Abyss!  Honest as the day is long, I looked down on the stone path next to me only to see where some soul had lost their supper.  I can’t think of a better way to explain what the first sight of the Grand Canyon is, than to say someone took one look and tossed their cookies.

To sum up a challenging and vigorous hike, my Bride I and carrying around 15 pounds of water each, made it to Indian Gardens and back in 7.5 hours.  That is a 3800 feet descent and back.  That year of training at the gym named after the clock paid off.  Although others do it faster, most don’t, regardless of their ages.

One bizarre observation I had visiting all the State Parks was the total lack of Texans.  We met only 5 in a week of travels, 3 of which were working concessions. I made it a point to question probably 60% of hikers we encountered.  Most were from other countries and continents,  Poles, Israelis, French, German, Russians, Chinese, Korean, Japanese, Spanish, Britain’s - you name it, we met them.

The rest of my encounters were Americans from the northern part of the US, escaping the cold.

Do American’s visit our national parks?  Are we shallow amusement park people only?  Are we really this plastic?  Are the YouTube videos of Americans being out of touch with everything except sports and the entertainment industry actually true?  We talked at length with a French couple at the highest point in Mesa Verde for a half hour and they had been touring America for… 5 months!

Do foreigners know more about our history and geography than we do?  I shudder to think this is true, but all evidence in our parks and historical sites points in this direction.  I want more.  I want to see and experience more of our history.  I don’t want to repeat it; I just want to recognize it.  I want to “be it”.

The drive to New Mexico, Arizona, Utah, and Colorado in my Jeep probably cost me twice the cost of gas of a passenger car, but we did it and we did it in American style.  I think the miles added up to over 3000 and we enjoyed every second of our American road trip.  Oh yea, the money we spent stayed in America too.
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It's all so clear now!

After reading about PAD, or peripheral arterial disease in Wednesday's Baytown Sun, I realized I must have this malady.  It all became so clear. Although this is sad news, it's actually good news because I can finally pinpoint all these weird and bizarre symptoms I occasionally (read: quite often) experience.

In case you skipped over (read: didn't bother to read) the informative article I'll 'splain it briefly.  “PAD is a common but serious form of vascular disease caused by a build up of plaque in the major arteries that supply oxygen-rich blood to your legs, feet, arms and pelvis”.

Common side-effects are: “cramp-like” leg muscle fatigue or heaviness, pain and discomfort that occur in the buttocks, thigh or calf muscles while walking or climbing stairs.  I can honestly and truthfully confess that I have these symptoms in Spin class and while hiking!  Especially the buttocks part and it usually starts about 30 minutes into the class.  My legs begin to have those classic cramp-like fatigue and heaviness symptoms too, especially when we do an extend five minute uphill pedal.  I can't for the life of me believe I didn't see this before.  I'm diseased!

Take last Tuesday for instance.  My Bride and I were out for a casual stroll in rocky Sedona, Arizona on the Slim Shady Trail (read: elevation 4500 feet).  I was carrying a small backpack with about 20 pounds of food water and supplies and it was a cool 55 degrees with the humidity around 20%.  No problem, right?  Wrong!

We hadn't gone (read: rocky trail climbing) more than 4 miles and I began to experience classic peripheral arterial disease symptoms!  In oil town plain speaking; my butt was aching, as were my feet, legs and lower back.  I know, I should have turned back, suffering from this disease, but I didn't.  I guess it was the majestic Cathedral Rock that mesmerized me into ignoring these symptoms - I can't say.

Up, up, and up we climbed until we were fairly close to the summit and all the time my buns, thighs, feet, and toes were burning.  I shifted the pack around and drank long from one of my water bottles as I stared at the giant red rock formations prevalent in the area.  I chuckled and remarked that "the locals ain't seen nuthin' till they've seen the Fred Hartman Bridge."  We both found this humorous for some reason.

We finished up the long hike back to my Jeep and danged if my Bride didn't complain of the very same symptoms!  On top of that, we both suffered a bout of lethargy!  We drove into Sedona and got a table at a place called Javelina Cantina. A hot plate of Arizona-style Mexican food partially restored us to our former healthy state.  I may just write the American Medical Association and explain that there may just be a healthy antidote for this PAD condition - Mexican food after heavy exertion.  It goes without saying that we both slept well.

Yesterday morning, ignoring the PAD symptoms we experienced only 2 days prior, we stood on the rim of the Grand Canyon's Bright Angel Trail... and began our descent to Indian Gardens 4.5 miles away.

Both of us were carrying close to 10 pounds of water and salty snacks and with walking sticks, the hike progressed fairly well, but each step down was the equivalent of putting on the brakes.  The incredible view made it easy to ignore the screaming thigh muscles as PAD began to rear its ugly head.  That is the only explanation I have for this condition - or is it?

The long hike down to Indian Gardens was nothing in comparison to the 4.5 hour hike back up the canyon trail.  As we neared the last mile and a half we encountered casual hikers who only planned to the do a smidgeon of the trail.  They were kicking up a lot of dust and that is when it hit me - I don't have PAD.  I don't have PAD any more than I have COPD - Chronic obstructive pulmonary disease.

I was simply coughing because the air is dry and I'm breathing dust.  I don't have PAD; I have what is commonly called EXERTION.  My body was simply responding to the extreme demands I was placing on it and heavy exercise doesn't negate these pains; it allows you to experience them and recover.  Wow!  What a revelation!

Of course I know this and the point I am making is actually quite simple.  Why wait until your body is failing before you do something to reverse the trend?  The outer trails are there to lure people to challenge themselves and make no mistake, they challenged us.  However the many visits to the gym on a regular basis made our trekking possible, but if you think your legs and buttocks won't ache, forget it. 

There are good aches and bad aches.  We experienced the good ones.