Monday, June 25, 2012

Rabbit Scares Woman in Jenkins Park!

Little harmless rabbit scares woman and fat baby in Jenkins Park, Baytown, Texas
My bride and I were walking our doggies at Jenkins Park the other day and we saw a young woman pushing a stroller coming toward us. A rabbit ran across the trail in front of her. She didn't see it and I asked her if she "saw that rabbit"? She said, "What?" and turned and at a trot, ran off pushing the stroller. I wonder what she would have done if a chupacabra had ran across in front of her...
 As she was running off, I yelled, "ITS RIGHT BEHIND YOU!!!" I laughed for 5 minutes.
  The back two wheels broke off the stroller and she snatched that kid out of there, like Craig Biggio on a hot grounder and little rocks were flying up behind her as she ran out of sight screaming. Craziest thing I've ever seen.
Baytown Bert was only trying to helpthe fat baby and scared woman.
 I snatched up the wheels and took after her, catching her with her 62 lb toddler quite easily, but she thought I was the rabbit and kicked it into overdrive, spraying me with painful pebbles. One of them lodged in my right nostril and I finally dug it out 5 minutes ago.
 She was running so fast, she ran right out of her shoes and as I ran past, I reached down real low like and scooped them up at a full gallop, hardly missing a step and that's when that durned rabbit passed me and headed up the trail toward that screaming woman and that fat baby.
 My dear departed Dad once taught his four sons how to catch a running rabbit and I did everything I could to get close enough to make the maneuver. It zigged to the right, I did too. It darted left, I was right on it. The fat baby saw us coming, as the woman was all in and had slowed considerably. The gordo baby began to bellar like a little torito and this somehow gave the woman what she needed and in a shot that would make Otis Thorp proud, she hurled that fat baby through the window of her Cadillac Escalade and jumping in behind the wheel...
The woman pushing the fat baby gave it everything she had...
 She laid a strip of rubber so thick, she was on the rims before she hit Raccoon drive. The resulting sparks ignited the rubber and that danged rabbit burst into flames before my very eyes. It took one incredible leap, ricocheted off the sewer lift station and disappeared below the surface of Cary Bayou. I pulled up short of the tennis courts and shook my head. If I would have only brought my camera!  When I got back to my Jeep, my bride asked me how it turned out and all I could say was...
  "Would you like a pair of neon red running shoes,  size 14?"

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